Megan Stammers: Our Unquenchable Thirst for Melodrama

Poor Megan Stammers was on the front page of my newspaper this morning. With her gloppy mascara and her teenaged colour rinse.

Were we running low on child murders or pedophiles this week? Because how a 15-year old’s “hot for teacher” crush and a 30-year old’s total lapse of good judgement has become front page news astounds me.

Remember that no one is alleging that anything terrible has happened to her. She’s off on a madcap trip to France with her stupid math teacher for a little hankie pankie. I suspect she might have easily been any one of us: gullible, romantic, drawn to the forbidden star-crossed lovers story.

What the hell has happened to us? How did we sink so low as to consider this even entertainment, much less national news? Has all this consumption of Twilight novels and too much Fifty Shades of Grey turned us into irrational imbeciles?

THIS IS REAL LIFE – not a fucking soap opera!

What began as a desperate flee to love on the part of two quite stupid people has now become everyone’s titillating breakfast reading, thanks to parents who obviously craved the media spotlight and a press that seems to have no ability to exercise any level of journalistic integrity anymore.
Now, of course, one can imagine there are some very frightening and paranoid discussions being had between a 30-year old married teacher and a 15-year old with little experience in romantic entanglements and less in PR damage control.

Between the parents and the press, they’ve escalated what would have ended in mutual disinterest into a psychological nightmare.

All to feed our unquenchable thirst for melodrama. Something has gone terribly wrong with us.